The Duties of Parents

  "The Lord teach you all how precious Christ is, and what a mighty and complete work He hath done for our salvation. Then, I feel confident you will use every means to bring your children to Jesus, that they may live through Him." ~ J.C. Ryle

From the series on Mr. Ryle's book "The Duties of Parents" at the Helping Children Grow blog.

Beauty Care for the Tongue

Someone was talking about this book on another blog and I ordered it several months ago, but just started reading it this week. I really am enjoying it. Very nicely written, easy to follow, with quite a bit of sensible advice. It's also very biblical, with many Scriptures sprinkled throughout. And let me say, there is probably a piece of counsel in this book for each of us. For me, Beauty Hint 2, " A Beautiful Tongue is a Silent Tongue," is a particularly needful one. Here's a little nugget from that chapter to give you an example:

"Often when we converse with another person, we don't really listen to what that person is saying. In fact, while the other person is speaking, we are thinking about what we are going to say in return. If both individuals are going through the same little ritual, we have the ludicrous situation of two people talking to themselves together! There is a sobering proverb: 'Fools have no interest in understanding; they only want to air their own opinions.' (Prov. 18:2 NLT)"

Is that ever true of you? I hate to admit, but there are times when it is of me. By the way, this book is one in a series of others on beauty care for different parts of the body, such as the hands. Order this one and see what you think. I probably will be getting a few more after this one.

For we which live are alway delivered unto death for Jesus' sake, that the life also of Jesus might be made manifest in our mortal flesh. 2 Corinthians 4:11

Lately I've been reading quite a bit about the lives of saints who suffered for their faith. Some of these sufferings were severe. Currently, I'm three quarters of the way through a book about the life of a brother in China. It's unbelievable the extent of the persecution that this man went through. And today during devotions, I read one of the short daily bio sketches in this book, The One Year Christian History. The glimpse I read today was about a believer in Bulgaria, another one who was tortured for his faith. I encourage you to get this book and read about the many lives, some by their shed blood, who are testimonies of the gospel worldwide. I promise you that you won't be sorry.

Of course, reading about people like Charles Spurgeon and Billy Graham are great encouragements, but I also think its important to reflect on the lives and trials of many who are little known to us. For they certainly are not little known to the God for whom they gave their lives, some literally. Needless to say, they will and should spur us on. Many of us who have it easy don't want things to get too difficult for us. Please don't let living the Christian life cause us too much discomfort or get in the way of us having and doing the things we want. I have a great remedy which I hope will help all of us: Ponder the stripes and chains of those who've gone before. This book will help you to do that.

Andrew Duncan's Will

There have been so many blessings that have come to me in my reading of the One Year Christian History devotional that I told you about on another post. Lately, the blessing was in the form of a Last Will and Testament of a godly man named Andrew Duncan, dated April 14, 1626. Wow. His thinking in his will is along the lines that all of us should want to have about ourselves, our children, and our possessions.

About himself, he said:

". . . First, as touching myself, body and soul; my soul I leave to Christ Jesus, who gave it, and when it was lost, redeemed it, that He may send His holy angels to transport it to the bosom of Abraham, there to enjoy all happiness and contentment; and as for this frail body, I commend it to the grave, there to sleep and rest, as in a sweet bed, until the day of refreshment, when it shall be reunited to the soul . . ."

How's that for the right perspective about ourselves? I love the view of life and death that was realized by these old saints of long ago.

About his children, he said:

"As for the children whom God hath given me, for which I thank His Majesty, I leave them to His providence, to be governed and cared for by Him, beseeching Him to be the tutor, curator, and agent, in all their adoes, yea, and a father; and that He would lead them by His gracious Spirit, through this evil world; that they be profitable instruments . . . holding their course to heaven, and comforting themselves with the glorious and fair-to-look-on heritage, which Christ hath conquered for them, and for all that love Him . . ."

Beautiful! Are we raising our children in such a way that we can have the assurance that Mr. Duncan seemed to have, that we are leaving them to the care of their heavenly Father? And are we making the choices for them now that will give us hope that He will be their tutor, curator, and agent, after we've gone?

Of his possessions, he said:

"As concerning my temporal goods, the baggage and blathrie of the earth, as I have gotten them in the world off God's liberal hand, so I leave them behind me in the world; giving most humble and hearty thanks unto my heavenly Father for so long and comfortable loan of the same."

What can I say? Our early possessions are at the best "baggage" for the journey, but this is a reminder that we will not be taking them with us when we leave here. So, they all should be held with a loose hand, at best, while being thankful to the Lord for them. (I don't know what the word "blathrie" means and couldn't find it in the dictionary. Do you know? Maybe it's some old English word, or some spelling difference.)

Folks, this Last Will and Testament is a prayer. Would it be that we all would have a perspective like Mr. Duncan when we make out our wills.

A Teenage Rebellion

Our copy of this book arrived today and my daughter and I are excited. In case you don't know about it, I thought a quick post was in order. The title is Do Hard Things and it's by Alex and Brett Harris, sons of Gregg Harris, whose writings helped a lot of homeschoolers in the early nineties. The subtitle is "A Teenage Rebellion Against Low Expectations." I got off on the right foot after reading the presentation page:

To our parents, Gregg and Sono Harris.

This book is the message of your lives.

Our triumph is your triumph. We love you.

Wow. How blessed Gregg and Sono are to have such a tribute written to them by their two sons. Alex and Brett are twins, and I think they are nineteen or so. I'm thankful to see a couple of young men who are stepping out in faith and DOING something to help the teens of this day and culture. I particularly like the cover of this book--it has a great color and style for this age group and guys as well as girls will like that.

My daughter (fifteen) and I are reading it separately and she's loving it. From what I've gotten so far, these boys have a lot to say and they can say these things and receive many more listening ears than we older folks ever could. Thank You, Lord, for giving them this vision.

Graduation time is coming, so keep this book in mind. Moms and grandmoms with teens, please think about getting it. I think even the struggling ones will read this, but not only that, I think they just might listen, given the source.

Note: There is more information on this over at the authors' blog. We got our copy from Amazon.

Christian Heroes

This past Christmas, our pastor gave this book to many of us who have served in our church in some capacity. Actually, I think just about every household ended up with one. The title is The One Year Christian History, a daily glimpse into God's powerful work, by Mike and Sharon Rusten. It's a devotional book, with a two page spread for each day of the year. Each day, some event or person is spotlighted, according to the date of some some occurrence in history. The earliest date is in 763 B.C. and the latest is in the year 2000. The 366 devotions can be started any time in the year.

This book is a blessing. You may want to get one for your family. I'm sure you, too, will be blessed. The publisher is Tyndale House, but Amazon and others have it. I've been captivated by some of the stories about people whom I can only refer to as Christian Heroes. It's mind-boggling how many martyrs there have been, some at the hands of other so-called Christians. It did strike me that all persecutors have not been Communists, Muslims or Hindus, but many have been burned at the stake and endured horrible atrocities at the hands of the particular orthodoxy of a time and place. Wow. You'll read about courage that you may not have known existed in the hearts of men and women. My heart has been touched reading these stories. I think yours would be too.

By the way, I've had a series going at the business blog called "Christian Heroes." Maybe you'd like to check those out from time to time and talk to your children about some of the heroes of our faith. I often link to "Glimpses for Kids", a very good site for children, which has all kinds of facts from Christian history. I think it's impotant for our children and grandchildren to know about these things, as it might encourage their young hearts towards greatness.

Right Paths

Let your eyes look straight ahead, and your eyelids look right before you. Ponder the path of your feet, and let all your ways be established. Do not turn to the right or the left; remove your foot from evil. Proverbs 4:25-27

This picture brought these verses to my mind. These are verses that I've often written on the greeting cards of young people, especially when they graduate from high school. Have you ever noticed how many times the words "path" or "pathway" appear in the book of Proverbs? Today I counted at least eighteen, all in the first eight chapters. And that's not counting the verses that speak about "walking in the way." Another verse many of us love is the one that says "the path of the just is like the shining sun."

But then there are the warnings. One of the devotionals in my Bright Gems book is devoted to these warnings. I called it "Turn From Evil" and in it I try to explain to children what the Bible means in Proverbs 4:14-19 when Solomon speaks to the young about not entering the "path of the wicked." In the day in which we're living, I'm sure that you'll agree with me that we should be lovingly exhorting our children about these things, especially our teens. And there are so many applications--movies, friendships, TV, books, music, etc.

But we always have to make sure we bring them to the only way that there is to walk in the way of righteousness and avoid the path of evil. It's only through and by Jesus. If we lead our children to Him, He'll lead them in the right paths by and by. Thank God for that.

Sunday Snippet - The Christian Family

"God honors not those who cling to their 'rights', but those who choose freely to obey Him."

This bit of truth is a quote out of a book that has been beloved in our house since early in our marriage. We have a different cover than the one shown here, but of all the books I've read on the family, this one by Larry Christenson has impacted me the most. Others of you may have a different favorite, but this one has always been mine. Believe me, it's worth having on your shelf as a reference. I love the five chapters from Part One, "God's Order for the Family" :


CHAPTER ONE: God's Order for Mates
CHAPTER TWO: God's Order for Wives
CHAPTER THREE: God's Order for Children
CHAPTER FOUR: God's Order for Parents
CHAPTER FIVE: God's Order for Husbands

I have received more help from Chapter Four than any other book I've ever read on the subject, except for a short book by J.C. Ryle, which I may talk about another time. The above quote, however, is from Chapter Two. Think about how it might be applied there, ladies.

I had a nice Lord's Day. Hope you did too.

Being Real

I was making a keepsake book week before last, which took me on a quest for quotes to put in it. I found all kinds of neat sayings and quotes in various places in my house and ran across the following excerpt from The Velveteen Rabbit, which you probably know is a beloved children's classic. I found this on a page of various quotations about marriage, believe it or not, and when I think about it, it does apply. But then I believe that it would also apply to parenthood and friendship. See what you think. This was a conversation which took place in the nursery between Rabbit and Skin Horse. You may know that Skin Horse was the oldest resident in the nursery and his age and experience had made him very wise. I once heard a pastor read this same excerpt during a sermon to mothers, and when he finished, my eyes were dripping with tears. The pastor himself was choking back tears as he read it to the moms in his congregation.

"What is Real? asked the Velveteen Rabbit one day.

"Real isn't how you are made," said the Skin Horse. "It's a thing that happens to you. When a child loves you for a long, long time, not just to play with, but REALLY loves you, then you become Real."

"Does it hurt?" asked the Rabbit.

"Sometimes," said the Skin Horse, for he was always truthful. "When you are Real you don't mind being hurt."

"Does it happen all at once, like being wound up," he asked, "or bit by bit?"

"It doesn't happen all at once," said Skin Horse. "You become. It takes a long time. That's why it doesn't often happen to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally, by the time you are Real, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in the joints and very shabby. But these things don't matter at all, because once you are Real you can't be ugly, except to people who don't understand."
-The Velveteen Rabbit by Marjorie Williams

Please read this precious little story to your children and grandchildren. And remember: be real.

Sunday Snippet - Greatest Preacher

And these words which I command you today shall be in your heart. You shall . . .talk of them when you sit in your house, when you walk by the way, when you lie down and when you rise up. Deuteronomy 6:6-7

This week's Sunday Snippet is found in this book. I don't know how familiar you are with Elizabeth George, but she's a prolific writer. She's a modern day devotional writer whom I look up to. I found a little tidbit in her A Mom After God's Own Heart, which I've been reading lately. As she exhorts us as moms to talk about God to our children, Elizabeth tells about renowned and eloquent preacher Dr. G. Campbell Morgan who had four sons who followed in their father's footsteps and became ministers as well. At some point, someone asked one of the sons which Morgan was the greatest preacher. Guess what the son's answer was? "Mother," was his reply.

Wow. It seems that here was a mother who not only spoke to her children about the Lord, but they had recognized her important role in their lives. And it appears that God had blessed this woman's words to her sons' hearts. I hope this is an encouragement to you, because it sure is to me.

A Consolation in Suffering

For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared with the glory which shall be revealed in us. Romans 8:18

What a God-honoring thing to see a struggling, sorrowing child of earth cleave fast to God, calmly trusting in Him, happy and at rest in the midst of storm and suffering! What a spectacle for the hosts of heaven! Now is the time for the saints to give glory to the Lord their God. Let them prize affliction as the very time and opportunity for doing so most of all. Let them use such a season well. And what consolation to think that affliction is really such a season!

Horatius Bonar

When God's Children Suffer

Sorry to have not kept my promise about the next Aunt Jane's Hero segment, but because of some events going on around me, I felt hindered. Instead, I want to once again address the trials of this life. I would recommend the above book by Mr. Bonar to anyone going through affliction or difficulties. What I wrote here was from his chapter on the consolation in suffering, found in the above verse from Romans. But there are even more reasons why we can say that it is good to be afflicted. He gives eleven, and it is from the sixth one, "Affliction is our fullest opportunity for glorifying God," that I've taken this quote.

I see some folks who are living examples of what Mr. Bonar is saying. Some are close friends; some are persecuted saints facing hatred, captivity and/or imprisonment. Some are bloggers that I don't even know. To them, and to all of us, I give the final words of the chapter:

Our joys were all of grace--pure grace--much more our sorrows.It is out of the "exceeding riches of the grace of God" that trial comes.

The Fruit of Longsuffering

Charity suffereth long....I Corin. 13:4

Years ago at a gift exchange, I received a book that has come to be close to my heart. The book is Charity and Its Fruits by Jonathan Edwards. You know how some of the old writers are, they're not always the easiest reading, at least not for me, but they usually pack in so much meaningful stuff, its worth it to dig and plow because there will certainly be a harvest in one way or another. It just takes a little time. In this work, I particularly have been ministered to by the section on longsuffering.

Our suffering is so minimal. Someone says something to offend us. Someone wrongs us in the way they treat us on a particular issue. Very little physical suffering. But think of those who are being persecuted around the world: some severely, some imprisoned, some losing their lives. Big in the news right now are the South Korean hostages being held by the Taliban. There are many more.

After giving the examples of David, Stephen, and Paul, Mr. Edwards says this:

And not only do we have these records respecting inspired men; but we have accounts in uninspired and mere human history, of the remarkable heroism and long-suffering of martyrs and other Christians, under the most unreasonable and wicked treatment and injuries received from men: all of which should lead us to the same meek and long-suffering spirit.

So, the next time we want to take offense for "wrongs" against us, let's remember these words.

Mother's Words

"Mother keeps saying I spend too much time in brooding over my sorrow. As for her, she seems to live in heaven. Not that she has long prosy talks about it, but little words that she lets drop now and then show where her thoughts are and where she would like to be. She seems to think everybody is as eager to go there as she is. For my part, I am not eager at all. I can't make myself feel that it will be nice to sit in rows, all the time singing, fond as I am of music. And when I say to myself, 'Of course we shall not always sit in rows singing,' then I fancy a multitude of shadowy, phantomlike beings, dressed in white, moving to and fro in golden streets, doing nothing in particular, and having a dreary time, without anything to look forward to.

"I told Mother so. She said earnestly and yet in her sweetest, tenderest way, 'Oh, my darling Katy! What you need is such a living, personal love of Christ to make the thought of being where He is so delightful as to fill your mind with the single thought!"

"What is 'personal love of Christ?'"

~Katy's entry for December 14, 1831~Stepping Heavenward, Elizabeth Prentiss

I have to tell you that Katy's mother is one of my favorite literary characters. I first read the book many years ago, but this particular entry really struck me at the time, and has been a favorite since. I wish I would respond to my daughters the way that this woman, who "seemed to live in heaven," normally did to hers. And note, these words "personal love of Christ" came back to Katy to grab her heart as she neared what was no doubt the latter part of her life, as she lay on her sick bed. I wonder what words will we speak that will be embraced by our children in their later years. I wonder will we speak words that will be with them in times of trial when we're no longer with them in the flesh.

Typos

I was thinking this morning...

For personal devotions, I'm going through the book of Matthew with Ryle's commentary on it close by my side. I'm about to finish up Chapter 10, and I've encountered three typos in the book so far. I hadn't noticed that before. Do you think these typos have had any effect on the usefulness of this commentary? The publisher is the Banner of Truth Trust, which puts out nothing but quality works. Anyway, I was thinking about these "mistakes" that I have run into so far and how they have not in the least taken away from the preciousness of the words that Mr. Ryle has written to touch our hearts with the Savior of mankind. The fact that I happened to notice that the word "everbody" was printed instead of "everybody" made no difference whatsoever.

The reason I noticed it this time is because I am doing so much revising and editing of my own writing lately and seeing mistakes all over the place. I guess I'm a little too paranoid about something getting published with a typo. We'll do our best that there be as few as possible, but most of us know that seldom do you read a published book that you don't find at least one error in it somewhere. So, I said all that to say that I was encouraged by those typos. They matter some, especially if there are too many, but one or two here and there could serve to remind us that what people are looking for isn't perfection, but words of wisdom, encouragement, comfort or laughter that speak to them where they are.

I hope that the words I write will speak to others of the love of God, and will be acceptable to Him.

Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in Your sight, O Lord, my strength and my Redeemer. Psalm 19:14

The Romans Treasury

I'm quite excited to have actually completed my study in the Book of Romans for teen girls . This was my largest undertaking thus far--I can't believe it's actually ready for me to start trying to find a publisher. My pastors have given it the okay, which is important to me, and now Pastor R. is even going to help me in my publishing search! The whole work is from a Reformed Baptist perspective, so here's hoping some RB publisher (or at least a Reformed publisher) will want to take it on. If not, Speakable Press will have to try to find a way to do it! I am so thankful to my Heavenly Father for bringing it thus far.

Coming to Romans 8:31-39, my most beloved portion of God's Word, I told my fictitious teen girl, Jewel, that we were standing on holy ground. How can we but marvel at these words:

"For I am persuaded that neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Romans 8:38-39